How do you react when you realize you were tricked?
Remember way back when in NYC or maybe other towns, when someone on the street, let's call him a dealer, would set up a table and three shells commonly called the Shell Game.
The dealer would put something like a pea under a shell and move it around the table very fast. If you could pick the shell the pea was under you would win money. Somehow almost no one would pick the right shell when it really mattered. You should have had a 1 in 3 chance of winning. But the odds were actually against you as the dealer had some tricks that only he knew about that made your odds of making the right decision even lower. But you were not told that. You went along with the game/charade and usually made the wrong decision.
The dealer almost always got what he wanted, but not you.
Most of the time you would fall for it once but not a second or third time. Although there were always people who thought they knew better and kept trying and continued to get duped.
Lesson learned:
Do not try and make a good decision when you are not given all the information you need to make a good decision, especially if much of the information is being hidden from you.
When I was much much younger, I believe in middle school, my father planned a family trip overseas. I was excited as any child would be. But then I found out I needed a travel vaccine to be allowed in another country. I knew it was going to happen but at an age of 11 I was not happy. I was told it would prevent me from getting sick as well as prevent me from infecting others when I return home. This travel "shot" had been used for many years and was known to be safe with minimal chance of side effects. Long term safety studies can be very helpful and should always be completed and all the data available for others to read. But to be honest at age 11 I didn’t know this nor cared. I trusted my father and the doctor but I just didn’t want a needle.
My father took me to a doctor to give me the shot. Woah!! All of a sudden it was not one shot. Now he said there were three shots in all. Hmmm. I thought there would only be one. But now there were three!! Bait and switch? One shot and all would be over and life would return to normal I was promised. But that was not the new reality I had to face. The goal posts were moved.
I wonder if it was planned that way and on purpose to pull me in and make me comply?? As an eleven year old who did not like needles I probably was not told the truth so that I would be more compliant. Thinking back now, even at age 11 I did not like being misled and not told the truth. I knew at age 11 there would be things I would need to do even if I did not want to. But I would feel better if I got to speak up and ask questions. I just wanted to be heard and not censored. Every now and then my voice would be acknowledged and it would change how things happened.
Back to the 3 shot surprise.
First thing I did at age of 11 when told there would be three needles instead of one was to hide under the exam table. But of course that did not last very long. I knew I would have to give in and get the shots but first I had to believe they were necessary and second I had to get the courage. I wanted to ask questions about the needles but I was told I couldn't.
I wanted to know what would happen if I did not get the needles.
I wanted to know what the likelihood was that I would get sick if I didn’t get the needles.
I wanted to know if I got sick were there treatments that would cure me.
But I was told that I did not need to know any of the answers. I was told just to believe that I needed them, no questions asked or allowed. Kind of like getting censored for asking a question that no one wants to have to go on record and answer. Either get the needles or you can not travel. No discussion. Debate shut down! The authority said so. It was not a democracy. I was being overruled by a totalitarian.
I was probably so scared of needles at age 11 that I would believe anything if it would reduce the #FearFactor
So my father and the doctor told me that they would start with the easy needle and save the toughest and most painful shot for last. Thinking back about that, is there ever an easy needle when you are 11? So the doc gives me the first shot. It hurt but not that bad. The second shot was a little tougher but I was OK. No problem there. I was about to run under the table again to delay getting the toughest and most painful shot when my father started laughing. He said he and the doctor tricked me and the first shot was actually the most painful one and the last shot was the easiest one. I was colluded against!!! For some reason at that moment I believed my father and took the third shot. I felt like since I was just fooled twice I had to redeem myself by going along and proving I could take the third shot. It hurt just as much as the first, maybe even more! But OK. All done. Finally finished. I can relax. WooHoo!!
Not so fast! I heard the sound of goal posts getting ready to be moved again. I was told that when we returned from our trip there was a chance we would be tested and possibly need another needle. Seriously? Was there an end to this or was it going to be shot after shot? Was this all known prior and I was not given the information?
This is what I call the opposite of transparency. I don’t think I would ever trust that doctor again. My father on the other hand, well, I had my ways as an 11 year old to get even with him……
The trip happened a month later and it was a great trip with many memories. Yet what I remember just as much as the trip is being manipulated and lied to by the authorities who happened to be the doctor and my father to get me to go along with something I did not fully understand. As an adult I understand why they did what they did. The rules stated I couldn’t enter a foreign country nor return home without the travel vaccines. But I was manipulated to get a desired end result. At age 11 I can understand being treated like a child. At age 11 I can understand that my father had the right to make medical decisions for me. But that does not mean it was right or fair to be manipulated.
So what am I getting at?
Why this long story?
To this day I am very very wary of being manipulated or controlled. It now takes a bit more to earn and keep my trust. Skepticism is always there. Show me the proof before I believe much of anything. I will ask questions and I want real and true answers. Let me see it with my own eyes and hear it with my own ears. I need to know that the information I am being given is all the information and that the recommendations serve my best interest and not just those of others/
I prefer to live in #TeamReality and not in #TeamLackOfTransparency .
How would you feel if you were lied to about a medical treatment?
How would you feel if you realize you were being manipulated so someone else could get their desired result?
How would you feel if you were only given a small part of the information needed to make a decision and not all the information?
How would you feel if you were not allowed to speak your mind? Do it or else go sit in the corner and keep your mouth shut? If you speak up and ask questions, well then, No soup for you!!
How would you like it if you were pressured, coerced or even threatened to do something against your wishes, especially when the reasons are hidden from you?
All of the above questions and many more have shaped my views and philosophy of my life and my medical practice.
I do NOT like being lied to or manipulated.
Likewise I will never lie to, manipulate, coerce or threaten any of my friends, family or patients.
In medical practice I believe everyone has the right to decide what to put into their body.
I believe in transparency.
If I do not know something, my answer will always be "I do not know", but let's do some research to find out.
I may be sarcastic.
I may have fun and keep things light with a few jokes.
But I will never lie, manipulate, threaten or coerce anyone.
Can we say that about the state of public health today?
Are we being duped?
Perhaps we need to ask questions and demand transparency in the answers, kind of like how Elaine turned the tables on the Soup N-zi.
Maybe when we are able to see all the data, see the entire recipe that public health authorities are using, we will once again have our rightful say in how to approach keeping ourselves safe and healthy with less concerns about getting duped.
More new strains—of course the worse ones yet. More boosters!!! Eek!! When does this all stop. Hard when your friends are just blindly getting shots and boosters and feel they are totally safe. A confusing time for me but my trusting the leading experts about the virus is very low. Will the health care leaders ever tell the truth? After watching the show on OxyContin and what everyone involved did for the money—makes me more skeptical. Those poor people who got hooked on these drugs. Sorry for epistle.
"Well then I guess we ain't goin' 🤷🏼♀️" - One friend's 7-year-old turning down an exciting impromptu trip to Puerto Rico last year after being informed that this carried the stipulation of her having to submit to yet another swab-to-the-skull or two.
Her resistance to medical tyranny was strong, and a nice staycation was had instead 😎